My forever friend

My best friend for three years

You always wanted to be with me
We finally took the plunge
Was it worth all the fighting
And the break up that crushed me
Is it worth the hate I feel growing some days
That is covered up by the love I feel for you
Is it worth my tears every time I think of you
A learning experience they call it
What did we learn?
That eventually all good things come to an end?
Because that's all I am getting from this.

When I said you ruined everything I wasn't being fair
We ruined everything
For example...
Cuddling you has forever been ruined
Hugging you will never be the same
The song I wrote about you makes me cry now...
All the I love yous feel like a lie.
And why?
Because we insisted on being more
We broke what was a perfect friendship
In the name what we called love
At the sake of our perfect friendship.

Whenever you smile at me now
It feels like a slap in the face
I retreat to a corner in my brain and cry
Scumbag brain says
"Look at that smile, it used to be just for you"
At some point I fell in love with you
I don't remember when it was
But I remembered to tell you everyday
I didn't want you to forget...
And now we're back to friends
So here's 1400 letters to you
My forever friend

We may have ruined everything.
But at least we ruined it together...